Does Stress Control How You Roll?

The hustle and bustle -- the daily rat race -- the price of life; our increasingly busy society has many monikers.  However, if not handled effectively, it can be summed up with one word: stress.  Stress is an energy that does not posses its own form or power until it assumes a host.  Technically, stress is only imaginary.  It exists on in the mind even though the effects of stress are evident in the physical body.  I used the word imaginary because the situations that cause stress are subjective to the person involved.  In most cases, stress is created from fear of not meeting expectations that are set forth.  This is why unexpected occurrences often increase levels of stress since they are hindrances to meeting existing deadlines, quotas, or objectives. 

So how do we deal with such formidable opposition to our otherwise smooth sail through life?  The answer is perspective and precaution.  As long as we are alive we will all have our share of ups and downs, wrongs and rights, good times and bad.  “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.”    That’s Newton’s third law of motion which contextually applies to physical masses, yet, is also applicable to our lives as well.  Our lives are always in motion; moving in, out, around, and about.  With all of this movement, it’s easy to see how one can become overwhelmed with all that needs to be done in our 24 hour time allotment.  We have to learn how to use perspective to our advantage and precaution as weapon.   

Perspective is often confused with perception.  Both words mean the way we see things.  The difference is that perspective is a choice.  Perception is what you interpret or believe to be the case.  Put on some dirty, weathered clothing along with a baseball cap turned backward, then go to the Mercedes lot and start browsing.  On your watch, time how long it takes to gain some attention from a sales person.  After he comes over, tell him you love the car and would like to take it for a spin.  Every salesperson is different so I won’t prejudge what the specific answer to that question would be.  However, browse the same car lot wearing a suit, clean cut and shaven, holding your Blackberry smartphone.  Do you think your experience would be the same?  Probably not.  The salesman is using perception to gauge the level of service he plans to provide.  If you reveal that you are a dressed-down millionaire or a well-dressed vagrant, the strategy changes immediately.  Perception can be, and is often, incorrect.

You can choose to view people, places, things, and situations in any manner you choose.  This is perspective (which is also one of the conceptions discussed in my book, “It’s Always Today”).  One of the most famous analogies for perspective is the half-full or half-empty drinking glass.  The amount of liquid does change no matter how you view it.  What changes is your strategy.  The glass either needs to be filled or finished.  Perspective can help you as mush as it can harm you.  Anything can be seen from a different angle than your current take on it.  Thus the reason that a job, spouse, children, social environment, money, and many other things that cause stress for some seem to bring joy to others.  These people of the latter make the most out of the hand they are dealt by looking on the bright side.  This is not always an easy task.  Do your best to think positive, even in a seemingly bad situation.  By doing so you will find that stress will return to its rightful, imaginary place.  

Precaution is one of the greatest weapons in the war on stress.  Surprises are a major cause of stress as they add to your already overflowing daily expectations.  While no one can be prepared for everything, being cautious goes a long way toward avoiding surprises and stressful situations.  There is such a thing as being overly cautious which can hinder your progress in achieving your goals.  You must learn to leverage the risk you take against what you are trying to win and willing to lose.  Then, whether you win or lose, you are better able to deal with the outcome of your moves.

The problem with stress is that it causes us to think, say, and do things that we otherwise would not.  Some of these things include swearing, yelling, slamming things, crying, fighting, aggressive driving, and a host of others.  Stress breaks us down from the inside out, affecting our relationships, performance, and overall health.  Simply changing our perspective and not allowing stress to control how we roll, we and reclaim ownership of our lives.  The world is full of surprises; prepare well and prosper.

-- Linwood R .Butler Jr.                          

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